No Permanent Address

| Alan

I recently read a Buzzfeed humor article, 31 Important Things You Learn When You Move Across The World. The article had two lines that really struck a chord with me: “You learn that forms that ask for a “permanent address” are evil, and didn’t account for people like you” and “ ‘Please provide a permanent address.’ *Cue Panic Attack*”

There is a lot truth in those lines, with Tracy and my retirement lifestyle of selling our home, being expats living abroad, short-term renting, and changing our city of residence every year or two has made us – by some definitions – without a permanent address.

In my previous career in police work, “No Permanent Address” or “No Fixed Address” was a euphemism for a person being homeless. (Tracy and I commented about being “homeless” after selling our house and the lease running out on our apartment rental just prior to our departure to Europe. It was an unsettled feeling for us, but certainly not the same as the reality faced by real homeless people.)

Wikipedia defines ” ‘No Fixed Abode’ or ‘Without Fixed Abode’ (as) a legal term generally applied to those who do not have a fixed geographical location as their residence. This is applicable to several groups:

  • People who have a home, but which is not always in the same place:
    • Those whose occupation requires them to live permanently on boats, ships, or movable oil platforms, or to travel constantly (as showmen, for example).
    • Nomadic peoples (e.g. Indigenous Norwegian Travellers and Romanichal) and traveller groups (e.g. Irish Travellers, Scottish Gypsy and Traveller groups, New Age Travellers, Norwegian and Swedish Travellers); as well as individuals who adopt a mobile lifestyle, living in narrowboats, recreational vehicles, or the like.

While we do have friends who are full-time RV travelers in the US, almost all of them currently own a piece of real estate or physical home somewhere (even if it is currently rented to a tenant.)  Tracy are I are hardly vagabonds who are randomly camping in Roma settlements around France, but our process of moving frequently creates a necessity of updating our visa status, address, and other issues with French government agencies.  Our French visas actually classifies us as long-term “visiteurs” rather than as residents.

No longer owning a home in America and not physically living there has created a bit of a “grey area” with residency.  What is our “permanent address?”

The concept of “no permanent address” is a legitimate concern in today’s world.  In these modern times, if you want to vote, have a driver’s license, open a bank account, register a vehicle, have a credit card, or obtain health insurance, it isn’t just enough to have a U.S. passport, you need a permanent address.  In addition to American expatriates living abroad, this is a very common problem in the full-time RV community in the US. A post office box in many states is insufficient for a legal domicile. The demand for a “permanent address” has spawned companies (especially in Texas and South Dakota, Escapees RV Club being one example) who cater to full-time travelers by legally providing a permanent address.

Tracy and I, like many expats, have elected to use a family member’s address as our  permanent address in our former hometown of Reno, Nevada.  (When I was college-aged I used my parent’s address as my permanent address as I “hopscotched” between living arrangements and roommates.)  Because of Tracy and my decades-long connection to Reno and Sparks as residents, students, workers, taxpayers, homeowners, raising children and still having local family, and it being our last home, Reno serves as our official, permanent US residence.

This need for a permanent address isn’t  just an issue for RVers and expats. George H. W. Bush had a long career of public service as a congressman, ambassador to the UN, envoy to China, director of the CIA, vice president, and finally president of the US. That career frequently required that he lived in Washington D.C., New York, Virginia, Maryland, or overseas. From 1985 until his retirement in 1993 he used the Houstonian Hotel, Club & Spa in Houston, Texas as his legal domicile and official voting address (although he moved out of Houston in 1981, stayed at the Houstonian intermittently, paid rent only for days his rooms were actually occupied, and owned an actual residence in Kennebunkport, Maine.)  Former President Bush had signed an affidavit stating that he would build his retirement home in Houston and the “intent” stated in that document satisfied Texas that he was a bona fide resident of Texas (although Texas’ action did annoy some residents of Maine who, because of his home in Maine, felt former President Bush should have been considered a Maine resident and pay the Maine state income tax.)  After leaving public office former President Bush did make good on his promise and retired to Houston.

By no means do Tracy and I attempt to be “Perpetual Travelers” whose primary motive is to avoid becoming legal residents of any country with the ultimate goal of tax avoidance and evading any legal responsibilities of residency.  We contribute our fair share and fulfill our responsibilities to our countries of citizenship and occupancy.

While Tracy and I like to entertain a romantic fantasy of ourselves living a free-spirited, Bohemian, and unconventional expat life (cue images of Hemingways’s “Lost Generation” traveling from Paris to Pamplona in the 1920s or Montmartre’s diverse arts community from the movie, “Moulin Rouge!”), we are actually fairly orthodox, living within the many rules of “the system,” and we are definitely “on the grid” with a permanent address . . . but with an untraditional – and ever-changing – physical address.

Ernest Hemingway seated in 1925 with the persons depicted in the novel "The Sun Also Rises." The individuals depicted include Hemingway, Harold Loeb, Lady Duff Twysden; and Hadley Richardson, Ogden Stewart and Pat Guthrie. John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum, Boston
Ernest Hemingway seated in 1925 with the persons depicted in the novel “The Sun Also Rises.” The individuals depicted include Hemingway, Harold Loeb, Lady Duff Twysden; and Hadley Richardson, Ogden Stewart and Pat Guthrie.
John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum, Boston

 

Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

| Alan

“I thought to see fair Carcassonne, that lovely city—Carcassonne!” ~ Gustave Nadaud

Our return flight from Rome to Marseille via Ryanair went as smoothly as the initial flight.  However we did have some concerns since the French rail strike was still going on. But our train was one of the 60% still scheduled and running. At the “moment of truth” the train arrived and we had our assigned seats waiting for us with no overcrowding. All in all we had been extremely lucky working around the national rail strike.

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We enjoyed the trip west along the Mediterranean coast and made it back to our current home in Carcassonne.

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We took a day to hike to the top of Château de Montségur is a former fortress located about 80 kilometers (50 miles) southwest of Carcassonne near the Pyrénées mountains and the Spanish border. The ruins are the site of a razed stronghold of the Cathars. The fortress is referred to as one of the “Cathar castles” that gave shelter to Cathars during the Albigensian Crusades.

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We also visited the nearby village of Mirepoix which has a substantial medieval ambience.

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Casey and Megan were finally able to catch up on some much-needed rest in Carcassonne and enjoy the vacation part of their trip. And Casey discovered Ricard pastis as a traditional summer-time French beverage. At the end of their stay (with the rail strike finally over) Casey and Megan took the train back to Paris for a two-night stay with tickets for a day at Disneyland-Paris. Knowing he is a big fan of Mickey, it was our birthday present to him.

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We waited until the last possible minute to warn them that there was talk of an air-traffic controller strike. Our silence paid off as at the last-minute the strike was culled down to only 10% of planes and limited to those going to other European countries. The kids made it to the airport and their British Airways flight without suffering through any more of France’s transportation worker strikes.

All in all it was a fantastic visit. We enjoyed meeting Megan and seeing Casey. We were overjoyed to finally being able to congratulate him in person for his university completion. The kids followed up their visit with a nice long Skype date so that we could meet their daughter, Izzy. The best thank you ever!

 

Part 1:  Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Palace of Versaille, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

Part 2:  Marseille with Casey and Megan:  Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

Part 3:  Rome with Casey and Megan:  RyanAir, Pantheon, Colesseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

Part 4:  Vatican City with Casey and Megan:  Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

Part 5:  Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

Vatican City with Casey and Megan: Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

| Alan

“St. Peter’s Basilica, the greatest church in Christendom, representing the power and splendor of Rome’s 2,000-year domination of the Western world.” ~ Rick Steves

Casey wanted to visit a micro-nation.  Originally he wanted to see Monaco (I believe because of his computer-like math capacities and  the world-famous casinos – see the film, “21“), but the idea of walking completely across a country in just minutes intrigued Casey too.  He enjoyed the concept and structure of a modern city-state, complete with its own military, police, broadcast facilities, and international ambassadors known as Nuncios.

We started with a visit to the famous Musei Vaticani (Vatican Museum) and the adjacent Cappella Sistina (Sistine Chapel.)  While we stood in line Casey and Megan went far to try real Italian gelato which they gave two “Thumbs Up.”  While waiting the clouds gathered again and we were rained on once more as we waited for entry.  True to our past experience, new immigrants arrived to the waiting visitor with a selection of folding and full size umbrellas, ponchos, and rain coats.  Fifteen minutes before the storm the same men had been selling souvenirs.  Our “entrepreneurs” worked the line almost to the point of aggressiveness, wanting to make their money quickly before the rain stopped.  Each of us were holding an umbrella, but that did not deter several of our impromptu salesmen.  “Would you like a poncho too?”  “A larger umbrella?”

For fun we overlapped our umbrellas like ancient warriors would overlap their shields on the battlefield.  Tracy selected one particular friendly, but persistent salesman as our principle nemesis:  “Poncho-man.”  Poncho-man would check with us every time he passed, about every 10-15 minutes if we were certain we didn’t need two umbrellas each rather than our paltry one.  The approach of Poncho-man would cause us to tighten our umbrellas into a “turtleshell” and a verbal response of, “No, Poncho-man, no!”  It became a game to pass the time with Poncho-man approaching with a smile and “Hello, my friends!” through the gaps in our umbrella and our cries of, “No, Poncho-man, no!”  Nice way to pass the time while waiting in the rain. Meanwhile, inside the museum, patrons were declining to exit considerably slowing the entrance of new patrons.

Casey hadn’t realized that the Vatican Museum had 55 galleries and was the fifth most visited museum in the world with more than 4 million visitors a year.  He was very pleasantly surprised at the size and variety of the collections.  Casey and Megan were especially impressed with Michelangelo’s 500-year-old paintings the The Last Judgement on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.  Sadly no photos are allowed inside the chapel.

 

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Coming out of the museum we headed inside Vatican City, behind where most visitors get a chance to see.  Tracy had arranged for us to take the “Scavi” tour.  It is a tour of the excavations of the underground necropolis that lies beneath Saint Peter’s Basilica.  Our guide was a Ph.D. archeologist who is one of the supervisors in the work. He shared amazing insights into the excavations, the controversy of Saint Peter’s tomb inside the necropolis, and the history surrounding the basilica.

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After exiting the Scavi tour, we visited Basilica di San Pietro in Vaticano (St. Peter’s Basilica), the largest church in the world able to hold over 80,000 parishioners at a single service.  Afterwards we explored Saint Peter’s Square outside the basilica and just outside Vatican City we followed the Passetto di Borgo (the covered fortified corridor) to Castel Sant’Angelo (Castle of the Holy Angel) and the Ponte Sant’Angelo (after a stop for adult beverages to re-hydrate from all our hiking.)

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Although not nearly a long enough visit to Rome and Vatican City, it’s time to show Casey and Megan our current home in Carcassonne, France.

 

Part 1:  Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Palace of Versaille, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

Part 2:  Marseille with Casey and Megan:  Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

Part 3:  Rome with Casey and Megan:  RyanAir, Pantheon, Colesseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

Part 4:  Vatican City with Casey and Megan:  Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

Part 5:  Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

Rome with Casey and Megan: RyanAir, Pantheon, Colosseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

| Alan

“All roads indeed lead to Rome, but theirs also is a more mystical destination, some borne of which no traveller knows the name, some city, they all seem to hint, even more eternal.” ~ Richard Le Gallienne

Arriving at Aéroport de Marseille Provence (Marseille Provence Airport) we intend to fly Ryanair for the first time.  Tracy has seen several reality TV shows which featured Ryanair’s uncompromising rules which allows the airplane to offer its cut-rate fares.  When Casey and Megan were still in the US we had sent Ryanair’s strict carry-on baggage rules:  one carry-on bag no larger than 55 cm x 40 cm x 20 cm (21.6″ x 15.7″ x 7.8″) plus one small bag of up to 35 cm x 20 cm x 20 cm (13.7″ x 7.9″ x 7.9″). (Tracy and I purchased new backpacks specifically to meet Ryanair’s requirements.)  But even this these notoriously small bag requirements, Ryanair does not guarantee that your bag will be allowed in the cabin.  If there is no more room in the overhead bins bags are stored in the hold for free.  Oversized luggage will be charged at substantial additional fees.  The reality show Tracy watched had numerous incidents of displeased passengers with oversized bags being billed additional fees or denied boarding and some passengers missing flights due to Ryanair’s strict check-in policy.  Ryanair has a 98% on-time departure record that comes with a requirement to have passport visas verified, passing through security screening, and admission to the boarding area at least 45 minutes before departure.

We were pleasantly surprised.  Although we showed up substantially early (concerned about an overflowing airport due to the train strike) we passed through easily and were treated very professionally by the Ryanair staff.  Horror stories aside, we were pleased with traveling Ryanair and decided to make use of their discount flights in the future.

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It was a quick flight to Ciampino–Aeroporto Internazionale (Rome Ciampino Airport) [about 12 kilometer (7.5 mi) south of Rome] we took the bus to the tram into Termini Station and a street car out to our hotel.  Tracy found a wonderful hotel in a suburb of Rome, while it was about a 30 minute ride outside central Rome, we had large comfortable rooms, a breakfast buffet, and paid “locals” prices at wonderful family trattorias in the hotel’s neighborhood.  We were treated wonderfully, paid a quarter of the cost for meals in Paris, and we kept wanting to return to try different dishes on the menu.  All that and the carafes of vino della casa (house wines) were inexpensive and delicious.

Roman Street Car
Roman Street Car

The Metropolitana di Roma (Rome subway) with only two “crossed” lines are not nearly as comprehensive as Paris, but most of the major sights are accessible off the subway.  Although Tracy and I have used the Rome bus system, we didn’t use it this trip.

We had a great time exploring the Roman Forum and the Colosseum. Although the rain would start and stop during the day, it helped to minimize the crowds.  It really is a “small world,” our friends Ron and Cyndy Coscuna just happen to be in Rome and we met them near the Fontana del Pantheon for lunch and later watched the rain fall through the oculus in the ceiling of the Pantheon.

We did get caught in a torrential downpour after leaving the Pantheon. Megan stopped at a little store to pick up a sweatshirt, Tracy and I headed next door to the bar to find refuge from the storm. When Casey and Megan joined us they found seats next to a couple from South Africa and had a nice chat while the bartender and owner tried to mix up a White Russian for Megan. With nearly four times the alcohol content, they finally succeeded. Megan stayed fairly warm afterwards. The owner didn’t quite believe that Megan was old enough to have the drink. Tracy reassured him that she was indeed old enough to order alcohol and though still a bit doubtful, he delivered her drink to the table. He did, however, need reassurance an additional six times. Yes, she really does look that young!

 

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Casey and Megan stopped to throw coins in the Trevi Fountain to observe the tradition that throwing coins with ensure you will return to Rome.  Unfortunately the fountain was largely covered with scaffolding for refurbishing.  But that gave Casey and Megan another reason to return to Rome in the future, to see the fountain flowing in it’s full glory.

After exploring Roma, it was time to visit the smallest country in the world, Vatican City.

 

Part 1:  Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Palace of Versaille, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

Part 2:  Marseille with Casey and Megan:  Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

Part 3:  Rome with Casey and Megan:  RyanAir, Pantheon, Colesseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

Part 4:  Vatican City with Casey and Megan:  Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

Part 5:  Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

 

Marseille with Casey and Megan: Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

| Alan

“No, my dear Dantes. I know perfectly well that you are innocent. Why else would you be here? If you were truly guilty, there are a hundred prisons in France where they would lock you away. But Chateau d’If is where is they put the ones they’re ashamed of.” ~ Dorleac, The Count of Monte Cristo 

After arriving at Marne la Vallée-Chessy train station outside of Paris to catch our Ouigo high-speed train to Marseille we are told that a surprise rail worker strike has caused that train and two prior trains’ cancellation.  (The strike is eventually 10 days, the longest rail strike since 2008.)  Casey and Megan were getting a truly French experience of dealing with a large-scale rail strike.  We were told there was a chance of getting on high-speed TGV train still scheduled to depart in 2 1/2 hours.  IF it arrived we may be able to get on board.  IF we got inside and the doors were able to close we could go as far as the train continued to run. IF. We decided to “take the shot” at getting on that train.  In the mean time we “camped out” at the front of the line, talked, played cards, and worked on Soduku puzzles.

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The train did arrive and we were able to squeeze into the hallway of a first-class carriage.  Other passengers were friendly with the “Life Boat” atmosphere and we stood or sat on the hallway floor for the first 2 1/2 hours of the nearly 900 kilometer trip.  About an hour out of Marseille departing passengers allowed us to finally get seats and we enjoyed the first-class luxury for the final hour of the trip, visiting with our neighbors in the cabin who were en route to the Côte d’Azur.  They were very friendly to their “refugee” seat-mates crashing first-class.  One gentleman was a French engineer who Casey had an animated discussion about their shared profession.  We would later read in the newspapers about people being stranded in rail stations for days and marvel that we were able to “pull off the impossible” and get one of the few remaining working trains to Marseille.

Marseille was completely unexpected.  I thought the city would be a gritty, slightly run-down port town.  Instead in was a clean, intriguing city that reminded me of San Francisco or Seattle. After wandering through the city I now understand why in 2013 it was awarded the title of Europe’s Capital of Culture.

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Our literary adventure was taking the boat out to Chateau d’Id, the historic prison off the Vieux-Port (Old Port) of Marseille, to experience the setting of Dumas’ fictional “The Count of Monte Cristo” and “The man in the Iron Mask” in real life.  Reminiscent of visits to the former Alcatraz Federal Prison Museum off the coast of San Francisco.

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Casey and Megan enjoyed taking the petit train up to Basilique de Notre Dame de la Garde located at the highest point in Marseille, about 150 meters (490 feet) above the south side of the Vieux-Port (Old Port), visiting the Musée Cantini with a collection including Picasso, Matisse, and Cézanne, and the strikingly unique Musée des Civilisations de l’Europe et de la Méditerranée [Museum of Civilisations from Europe and the Mediterranean (MuCEM).]

Notre-Dame de la Garde
Notre-Dame de la Garde
Museum of European and Mediterranean Civilizations (MuCEM)
Museum of European and Mediterranean Civilizations (MuCEM)

After a too-short visit and a sample of great seafood, we committing ourselves to returning in the near future and exploring more of Marseille at a future date.  We now headed by bus (the rail strike was still going on) to Aéroport de Marseille Provence (Marseille Provence Airport) to catch Ryanair for Rome.

 

Part 1:  Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Palace of Versaille, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

Part 2:  Marseille with Casey and Megan:  Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

Part 3:  Rome with Casey and Megan:  RyanAir, Pantheon, Colesseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

Part 4:  Vatican City with Casey and Megan:  Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

Part 5:  Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Château de Versailles, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

| Alan

“Paris is always a good idea.” ~ Audrey Hepburn

Our son Casey and his fiancée Megan became our second set of visitors to France.  The trip was to celebrate Casey’s graduation with his Chemical Engineering degree, his hiring as an engineer with the State of Nevada’s Chemical Accident Prevention Program, and his engagement to Megan.  So many important milestones to celebrate, but we were mainly looking forward to seeing Casey and meeting Megan for the first time.  Tracy had extensively pre-planned the trip in the attempt to try to visit everywhere Casey and Megan wanted to visit.  Tracy had the reservations made and confirmations organized to minimize the stress of traveling.  Tracy and I subscribed to the  “Fast and Light” school of travel with lightweight backpacks and making use of discount travel options as much as possible.

Tracy's collection of tickets, passes, reservations, and confirmations.
Tracy’s collection of tickets, passes, reservations, and confirmations.
Tracy and my "Fast and Light" backpacks that are "Ryanair" size approved.
Tracy and my “Fast and Light” backpacks that are “Ryanair” size approved.

We left Carcassonne the day prior to Casey and Megan’s departure from the US to be able to meet them in Paris.  We took the SNCF train to Montpellier and transferred to the Ouigo TGV high-speed train to Paris.  We love the economy of the Ouigo where we can often get a trans-France train trip for as little as €10.

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The Ouigo rolled into the Gare de Marne-la-Vallée – Chessy train station outside of Disneyland-Paris and caught the RER A (Réseau Express Régional) regional train into Paris proper where we used the Paris Métro system to picked up the key and settle into our apartment in the Belleville neighborhood of the 19th arrondissement.

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The next morning Tracy and I walked about the Île de la Cité and Latin Quarter visiting the Panthéon to see the photo project that we took part in Carcassonne and hoping to spot our photos in the display used to disguise the scaffolds used to refurbish the monument. (Carcassonne – Au Panthéon Photo Project)  Then it was off to Aéroport de Paris-Orly to wait for Casey and Megan’s arrival.  It was our first time at the Orly Airport so we took the RER B line early in order to figure out international arrivals.

Aéroport de Paris-Orly
Aéroport de Paris-Orly
Aéroport de Paris-Orly
Aéroport de Paris-Orly

We were excited to see that Casey and Megan arrived without any problems.  We skipped the baggage claim area since they both joined us in our “Fast and Light” method of having a single backpack each for luggage and we were off to the RER for the ride to Paris talking all the way.  We headed back to the  Île de la Cité 

 

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We “barnstormed” Paris trying to visit as many sites as we could squeeze in.  Megan had her first experiences with a subway with the very busy, but useful Paris Métro.  She was the only one of us not to be reversed and turned-around using the street and subway map.  We visited Notre-Dame de Paris (a must for Casey who  is a major fan of Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre-Dame), explored the Renaissance and Egyptian sections the Louvre Museum, walked the Avenue des Champs–Élysées from Place de la Concorde to the Arc de Triomphe de l’Étoile, Casey and Megan added a “Love Lock” to the Pont des Arts bridge, and enjoyed a chautauqua-type tour of the Eiffel Tower visiting the historic military radio room in the foundation and getting an “insider’s” view of the elevator system with a view paris from above the second level’s Restaurant le Jules Verne.  

Next venue on our itinerary:  Marseille.  A first for all of us.

Part 1:  Paris with Casey and Megan: Notre Dame, Palace of Versaille, Eiffel Tower, Love Locks, and the Louvre

Part 2:  Marseille with Casey and Megan:  Train Strike, Chateau d’If, Vieux-Port, Phare de Sainte Marie, and Notre-Dame-de-la-Garde

Part 3:  Rome with Casey and Megan:  RyanAir, Pantheon, Colesseum, Roman Forum, and Trevi Fountain

Part 4:  Vatican City with Casey and Megan:  Vatican Museum, Sistine Chapel, Necropolis Tour, Saint Peter’s Basilica, and Saint Peter’s Square

Part 5:  Carcassonne with Casey and Megan: La Cité De Carcassonne, Château de Montségur, Mirepoix

 

Grading our Spam Comments

| Tracy

I have been wanting to write this article for a while. It’s silly really. Our blog gets a lot of spam. I usually browse through it once a week or so, just in case someone we actually know has been flagged as spam. It happened only once, but now I look just in case.

The different trends for spam comments amuse me. I decided to save up 100 spam comments and evaluate them based on type and decide who I believe has the best overall spam comments. I based this on how well they are written, not just on frequency.

I find that I am developing a palette for what I believe is a good spam comment. It should be short, politely vague and slightly complimentary. It should take into account the title of the post it is spamming, or what I call “content matching.” Two months ago I had several that copied the title of the post back into the spam comment. I thought that took a little extra effort and decided that I liked that in my spam comments. I believe that if I’m to receive a falsely complimentary spam comment, that it should be based on at least one tangible quality, i.e. well written, helpful, etc. I also believe that quality spam comments should be original or unique, not just the same copied and pasted content from last month. Good spam comments should also be proofread before the submit button is clicked. But above all, quality spam comments should use proper grammar, punctuation and spelling. No “text talk” types of spelling such UR (you are) or IDK (I don’t know). So with my new style guide firmly in mind, I began reviewing my most recent 100 spam comments.

The winner was ClubTickets. They write the most literate comments, each one is different and they are short, vague comments. I appreciate that they are not multiple paragraphs of links to other sites. Here are some of the better comments received from ClubTickets and a couple notables of the 100 reviewed. I graded them . . . because I could.

From Liz: “Hello, just wanted to mention, I loved this blog post. It was helpful. Keep on posting.” [posted to Carcassonne: Oenovideo Film Festival and Terroirs d’Images Photo Exhibition]

Helpful for what Liz? Your comment is a little too vague. You get an A- for your spam comment. Just a few points off for punctuation and content. “Hello, just wanted to mention, I loved this blog post,” is not one sentence.

From Jordan: “Let me know if you are looking for a writer for your blog. I think I have much to offer. Spark off an e-mail if you’re interested.” [posted to: Carcassonne: Oenovideo Film Festival and Terroirs d’Images Photo Exhibition]

Sure thing Jordan, we definitely need a guest writer for posts about events we attend personally. You get a B, didn’t quite nail the content for that comment, dude. An e-mail is sent off, not sparked off. Colloquially you can also “shoot” someone an e-mail, if you must. Congrats on using “you are” instead of making the common you’re/your mistake. I gave extra credit for using it properly.

From Bridgett: “I’m not that much of a online reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your site to come back later on. Cheers” [posted to Carcassonne: Oenovideo Film Festival and Terroirs d’Images Photo Exhibition]

Oh, please do, Bridgett we so look forward to your spam comments. You get an A-. Your first sentence is clunky but you made a nice effort. “. . . online reader to be honest, but your “blog is” really nice. Keep it up!” Well done though, politely vague and not filled with loads of unwanted spam links. A real pleasure to read. Be sure to watch your punctuation. Remember, commas are our friends.

From Alberto: “Hi, i think that i noticed you visited my site so i came to go back the want?. I’m attempting to find things to improve my web site! I assume its adequate to make use of a few of your concepts!! [posted to Carcassonne: Oenovideo Film Festival and Terroirs d’Images Photo Exhibition]

Sorry Alberto, you get a D. “… go back the want?” is not a question and “I” should always be capitalized. Nice try but you and I both know that I didn’t visit your site. You cannot fool me into thinking that I’m wrong. Remember the name of the game is to get me to “approve” your comment so that you can spam all of our subscribers. You are trying to hard. Relax and try a different approach. 

From tickets: “Heya! I’m at work browsing your blog from my new iphone! Just wanted to say I love reading through your blog and look forward to all your posts! Carry on the outstanding work!” [posted to: Carcassonne: La Fête Nationale Fireworks (Bastille Day)]

Nameless ticket dude, thank you very much. We work hard to impress spammers like you. However, you get an F. While I appreciate the comment, you didn’t include your name on your spam comment. You must include a name to be taken seriously as a spam commenter. You have forgotten that capitalization is important, just check out Alberto’s grade. And, worst of all, you are playing with your phone and spamming people while at work, shame on you.

From Kathleen: “This is the right webpage for anybody who would like to find out about this topic. You understand so much its almost tough to argue with you (not that I actually will need to…HaHa). You definitely put a brand new spin on a topic which has been written about for a long time. Wonderful stuff, just wonderful!” [posted to: Carcassonne: Adam and Liz Exploring la Cité de Carcassonne and Canal du Midi]

Thank you Kathleen, we appreciate your vote of confidence on how much we understand. However, you still get a D. Content is key Kathleen, there wasn’t an argument to be made in our post. The post was about Adam and Liz exploring town, just some photos of the four of us having a good time. Not a topic that has been written about for a long time. Content matching is high on my list for quality spam commenters. Better luck next time.

From Blair: “I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your blog. Is this a paid theme or did you modify it yourself? Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one today.” [posted to: Carcassonne: Adam and Liz Exploring la Cité de Carcassonne and Canal du Midi]

Thank you, Blair. I don’t believe our writing skills are all that impressive, but I appreciate the sentiment. You get an B+. “… writing skills, as well as, the layout” don’t forget about punctuation. “. . . excellent, quality writing” make sure to separate your adverbs with commas!

By the way, the blog’s theme is noted at the bottom of the web page. The theme is Delicious, and it is both a paid theme and modified.

From Gertie: “I believe that is among the such a lot significant information for me. And i am satisfied studying your article. However want to statement on some common things, The web site style is great, the articles is actually excellent :D. Excellent process, cheers” [posted to: Carcassonne: Oenovideo Film Festival and Terroirs d’Images Photo Exhibition]

Thank you so much, Gertie. We work very hard to post significant information, though I doubt it was necessary to study a post about an annual film festival. Nice use of the capital D smiley face. Happy to read that you find our process and articles excellent. However, you get a D. “I believe that is among the such a lot significant information for me” is not a real sentence. Articles (plural) “are” excellent. “I” should always be capitalized. A person can comment on something or can make a statement. Someone does not statement on something. A little focus is needed Gertie. I’m sure you’ll do better next time. Cheers.

From Bradford: “Good blog you have here.. It’s difficult to find quality writing like yours these days. I seriously appreciate people like you! Take care!!” [posted to: Carcassonne: La Fête Nationale Fireworks (Bastille Day)]

I believe that there is plenty of quality writing available online but we appreciate the thought. You get an A-.  A slight punctuation issue: only one period necessary at the end of a sentence. Overall, your comment was nicely written. Polite, but vague as one would expect of a good spam comment. In the future, however, a little proof reading will earn you a better grade.

From Leta: “I’ve learn some excellent stuff here. Definitely price bookmarking for revisiting. I surprise how so much attempt you put to create any such magnificent informative site.” [posted to: Carcassonne: La Fête Nationale Fireworks (Bastille Day)]

Leta, Leta, Leta. You “learned” excellent stuff. There is no such thing as “price bookmarking.” And your last sentence makes no sense at all dear. You get an F. I think you should ask Bradford to tutor you.

From Todd Fields: “Fastidious answers in return of this matter with solid arguments and telling everything regarding that.” Todd’s e-mail: nanowrimo.org/participants/toddfieldlosangeles4570 [posted to: Finding our Rhythm | Days 20 to 26]

Todd, epic fail my friend. The blog post you commented on was about our sojourn into Spain for six weeks on the Camino de Santiago de Compostella. There were no fastidious answers or solid arguments. We did tell “everything” regarding our journey; long and drawn-out as it was. I am surprised that you were so off-base with your spam comment considering that your e-mail address suggests that you are an aspiring writer. You get a D. Vague and polite but completely off-topic.

The following two spam commenters received special awards.

Most AP Style Guide aligned: SEO Spam Commenter, Otis From Otis: “Nice blog right here! Additionally your site lots up fast! What web host are you the use of? Can I get your affiliate hyperlink on your host? I wish my website loaded up as quickly as yours lol” [posted to: Camino de Santiago Preparations – Equipment Lists]

Polite, vague and short – the three things I appreciate in good spam comments. It was a solid effort, Otis, but there are still a few issues. A website “loads” up. Someone “uses a web host.” Asking for someone’s affiliate hyperlink is just a bit too personal for a first spam comment.

In addition, you happened to spam comment one of our highest spammed blog posts. I deducted a few points because you are not being innovative with your search technique.

However, I would also like to congratulate you on proper use of “website.” For many years the Associated Press Style Guide gave the option to use “website” as either one word or two, but in 2010 they made a definitive ruling that it is one word. You did receive extra credit for this as none of the others who used the word had used it correctly. And because I have a strong affinity for the AP Style Guide. It was my style guide of choice for 18 years while working in a college marketing and public relations office.

Though not as well written as some of the others, you get a B+ for being the first to use “website” correctly. Good job, Otis!

Most Incredibly Vague: Mary Ellen Flemming From Mary Ellen Flemming: “This piece of writing gives clear idea designed for the new people of blogging, that really how to do running a blog.” [posted to: Camino de Santiago Preparations – Equipment Lists]

Thank you for the feedback, Mary Ellen. I am giving you a nice, solid D. Polite and vague are appreciated in spam comments, but I’m afraid I can’t just let you off on some problematic language issues. A piece of writing doesn’t “give,” the writer “gives,” a clear idea.

Additionally, your comment was completely off-topic, the post was about our preparation and equipment for the Camino de Santiago. It was not designed for “the new people of blogging.” Nor was it “intended” for “people new to blogging,” which would have been a better way to make that statement.

I also need to add here, Mary Ellen, that the product with which you were trying to spam me was completely vague. I could not discern what you were trying to sell me, not even in general terms. The idea is to bait me into approving your comment so that you can spam all of our subscribers. 

I fear that you will not do well as a spam commenter if you are not a little more focused on selling the product. Perhaps you are too nice to be a spam commenter. Whatever future career choice you make, I’ll be cheering for you!

 Spam Breakdown

Top commenter: ClubTickets 12 spam comments in a three-week period. ClubTickets’ spam comments are also the most well written of all those received. They are short, vague and easy to delete, no scrolling for long minutes to find the bottom where the Delete Permanently button lives. I appreciate that there is some minimal effort put into making their spam comments the least annoying.

The following comments are listed by volume and category.

SEO – 10, one of which was obviously typed on a Cyrillic keyboard (SEO stands for Search Engine Optimizer, key words that a search engine uses to find your site)

Shoes – 9, Christian Louboutin spammers were first with 5 spam comments

Women’s Clothing – 8, Karen Millen spammers were first with 4 spam comments

Vegas Show Tickets – 6

Purses – 5, Louis Vuitton spammers were first with 2 spam comments

Cosmetics – 4, Mac and Sephora spammes were tied with 2 spam comments each

Sunglasses – 3, Oakley spammers were first with 2 spam comments

Payday loans – 2

Jewelry – 2, both spam comments from Tiffany

Weight Loss – 2

We received only one spam comment for each of the following (in no particular order)

Woodworking Plans – at least it’s a new idea

Carpet Cleaning in the LA/Santa Monica area – guess they didn’t read the post they were spamming!

Clarisonic Ideals – don’t even know what this is really

Reverse Phone Lookup – blah, blah, blah

Payday Loans/Pizza – yep actually received this mash up spam comment. My personal favorite and Winner of the Best Mash-Up Award!

Multiple links – 19 paragraphs of text that barely resembled the English language; a total of 28 different links. Winner of the Multitasking Award!

Escorts – old school, was surprised they weren’t selling viagra with it as a mash-up marketing ploy

French Porn – thanks to my new neighbors, you’re getting to know me so well . . . not!

Chocolate – has potential, was even French chocolate

Cellulite – been done before

Detroit Lions Jerseys – didn’t realize the Lions were so hard up for fans

Cosmopolitan Magazine – tacky, especially for a fashion magazine

Body Power Express – never heard of it

Maps – yes, just generic paper maps, interesting marketing idea but doesn’t everyone have Google Maps on their smartphones?

Internet Marketing – Really! A vague, broad spectrum spam comment with a link to an even more vague website. And they want to sell marketing to me . . . hehehe! Winner of the Most Ironic Award!

Online Gaming – lovely idea, selling online gaming to a former Nevadan. Brilliant marketing ploy! Winner of the Mapes Award! For those who are not from the Reno area, the Mapes was the Grand Dame of Virginia Street Casinos. She closed in the 90s and was demolished to clear the way for development in the downtown corridor. 

In the too vague to realize what they were selling category – 5 I was unable to decipher 12 comments as they were not in English nor did the e-mail address give me any identifying information for their content.

We received 4 in German, 4 in French and 2 in a logographic (i.e. pictographic/ideographic) language – 2

Hope you enjoyed reading my review of the last 100 spam comments we’ve received. Cheers!

Carcassonne – Tour de France 2014

| Alan

We were able to watch a part of the internationally renown Tour de France bicycle race. Leg 16 started in Carcassonne.

Tour de France Logo (Wikimedia Commons)
Tour de France Logo
(Wikimedia Commons)

The 101th running of the Tour de France’s stage 16 raced through Carcassonne literally a half block from our apartment.  This stage was the longest of the 2014 race with 237.5 kilometers (148 miles) from Carcassonne traveling west up through the Pyrénées mountains and finishing in the village of Bagnères-de-Luchon near the Spanish border.

Tour de France 2014, Stage 16 (Reuters)
Tour de France 2014, Stage 16
(Reuters)

The Tour de France was actually two events for us.  The first was a parade of sponsor’s floats, called the Tour de France Caravan at 8:45.  Dozens of cleverly designed floats drove by throwing novelties, t-shirts, hats, and samples.

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At 10:45 the racers (followed by their support vehicles) sprinted past as they circled the town and headed west.  We got to see the traditional yellow jersey on Italian bicyclist Vincenzo Nibali at the head of the pack of the 22 teams.  Although this was the mass start at the beginning of the race with careful riding through the narrow, twisting city streets, the entire pack of nearly 200 racers past us in less than 20 seconds.  We were cheering for US racer Tejay van Garderen who was in sixth place overall.  Thirty-four year old Australian Michael (‘Mick’) Rogers used his experience to climb the five peaks and power through the 237.5 kilometers (148 miles) to win this stage with a time of 6 hours, 7 minutes, 10 seconds.

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After the chase cars, there were support trucks, motor coaches, and media mobile broadcast trucks.

We had a great morning experiencing in-person an event that has been exciting the world for over a hundred years.  We are also anxious to learn if Vincenzo Nibali will be the overall winner when the Tour de France’s concludes this weekend.

Tracy at the Tour de France 2014
Tracy at the Tour de France 2014
Route of the 2014 Tour de France. (Wikimedia Commons)
Route of the 2014 Tour de France.
(Wikimedia Commons)

The Motif Of The US Flag In France

| Alan

I find it interesting how often I see French people wearing clothing and or using advertising and decorating items based on the US flag’s iconic “stars and stripes.”

I’ve often wanted to take photos of French locals wearing interestingly designed US flag themed clothing.  Out of respect for their privacy (and not wanting to look like some kind of deranged stalker) I haven’t been photographing actual people. But with US Independence Day approaching, I thought I’d share a sampling of “stars and stripes” items I’ve seen in local stores.  Great Britain’s Union Jack flag designs and New York City items like New York Yankees ball caps and t-shirts are very popular too.

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